1. Dear Birth Mother/Father

This is a must! You must address the birth parents in a sincere heartfelt letter. Pin this blog post so it is the first or one of the first that visitors see. Any agency, facilitator, or lawyer you work with will want you to have a letter to birth mother/father. Speak from the heart. It doesn’t need to be extremely lengthy, but you do need to know your audience. Talk less about you and more about them and their struggle with this decision.    

2. About you

Make a post dedicated to you. It’s even ok to make several! One about you, one about your spouse, and one about your relationship. You can include things like personalities, hobbies, careers, and what your role will be parenting a new child. You could write it about yourself or let your spouse write about you. And, include plenty of pictures here!

3. Why Adoption

It is important for a birth parent to understand why you are choosing to adopt. Have you always dreamed of adopting? Have you struggled with infertility? Were you yourself adopted and want to share that with a child? Birthparents want to know you are invested. This is their baby before they are yours, and they are choosing adoption out of love!   

4. Home 

Show off your home in this blog post! Write a few sentences and show pictures of the outside and main living areas. If you have a bedroom ready for baby show that off too! This is your home so include information about your community. Do you live on 20 acres with horses? Do you live in a subdivision with a pool? Do you live in a large city or small town? You can talk about all of these things without writing your address down or telling the entire internet where you live!

5. Faith 

If you are a faith-filled couple and want to share your religious beliefs, do so! Yes, this will scare some birth mothers away, but it will also draw in the birth mothers that are right for you! Share what denomination you are, what your church family is like. Some birth parents may want their baby raised Catholic or other specific religion.  

6. Adoption Relationship

It is important to be very honest with your view on the future adoption relationship. After you sign those papers and take legal custody for your child there are no rules about your future relationship with the birth parents. If you are wanting a closed adoption the birth parents need to know that going in. Whatever you decide open, semi-open, or closed should be in the forefront of conversation.

7. Promises To Your Birth Parents

This blog post is a little extra and could be different than what you have seen. Make a post dedicated to what you promise this birth mother and father about raising their baby. Promises of unconditional love, a stable home, and opportunity. Promises of family game nights, and always having a place to call home. Promises of guidance, discipline, and always knowing where they came from. Whatever you promise make it genuine and not fluff!

In the end, put as much information about you as you feel comfortable. You want the right birth mother to find you, and you are not looking for just any birth mother and baby. You are looking for YOUR birth mother and baby!

The post 7 Things You Must Share on a Hopeful Adoptive Parent Blog appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

The first way to remove the “scary” factor from foster adoption is to really see your child. See their fear, their vulnerability, their needs, and their pain. You need to look past their behaviors and figure out what is driving their challenging behavior and difficult words. Look and see their potential, their need to be loved, and their need for stability.

The second way is to realize that a child who is adopted comes from a place of loss. In their life they have had at least one loss; potentially two or more. Sometimes foster children move around before they stay with their forever family. Sometimes children in the foster system have suffered physical or emotional abuse or trauma. More often than not, children who are adopted from the foster care system are dealing with a lot of baggage from where they’ve come. This baggage often causes behaviors that are difficult to understand. Sometimes these children have undiagnosed conditions such as FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders) or RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder). Those conditions may seem “scary” however, they are still children first, who need love and to be cared for. It’s not an easy job to parent a child with a disability, but these children need someone in their corner who is for them. Someone who is truly committed to them through the good and the bad. The bad will be bad, but the good moments will be amazingly beautiful.

The third way is to understand that in most cases it takes a team to raise a child. When raising a child who is adopted from foster care, it will likely involve more than just you. Children may be at various stages emotionally and physically and thus sometimes physical therapists, speech therapists, psychologists, behavioral therapists, psychiatrists, school teams, pediatricians, counselors and residential treatment centers may be essential to helping your precious child through life and in family life. As a parent, it is sometimes difficult to realize that our love for our child isn’t always enough, but it’s definitely needed, as it is the basis for why we advocate strongly for the additional assistance necessary to help our child succeed. These decisions can be extremely tough and stressful. As a parent, you advocate and you do what you need to do, to help your child; one step at a time. 

The fourth way is to put plans in place for the safety of the family if your child should have a meltdown. It’s important to understand that the meltdown is a cause of some sort of overstimulation or traumatic memory, not a reflection of how the child really feels about their adoptive family. Coach your child on ways to de-escalate and help them find strategies that work for them.

The fifth way is to research, read, and learn all there is to know about trauma and attachment parenting. Find other families that have adopted from foster care to learn about what you can do to help grow that bond between you and your adopted child. Be your child’s biggest cheerleader. Whenever possible, exclaim over and reward the positive.

And lastly, use humor and self-care to keep yourself in a compassionate and caring mood. Your child has been through a lot. They will spend time testing you to see if you will leave them or hurt them as they have been in the past. It will not be easy, and you will have to develop a tough skin to let their words and actions roll off of you. If you can take care of yourself–enough nutrition, exercise and sleep and a little respite time here and there then you will be able to deal with your child who is hurting in a more compassionate way. Always remind yourself that they need your understanding, your compassion, and your grace more than your disapproval and anger. Use humor to lighten the mood whenever possible.

Parenting is scary. You never know what will happen tomorrow. We’d like to have control over everything, but unfortunately, we do not. So why not face your fears and step onto the roller coaster? Most likely it will leave you feeling amazed and the exhilarating highs will outweigh any of the lows that you felt. There are so many children in foster care just waiting for you to face your fears and say yes. They will change your life for the better and you, in turn, will hopefully, change their life for the better as well. It’s often not easy and can be very challenging, but if you work to take the “scary” out of it, then you will see just how a child can thrive when given the opportunity. Are you willing to say yes?

The post Why Foster Adoption Isn’t Scary appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

1. Phil and Alex Youtube channel. Phil and Alex make vlogs in California about their family life and working to start their non-profit, Love Multiplies. They have gone through various infertility struggles and have been fortunate to adopt twice. Their vlogs show everything from open adoption relationships with birth moms to adoption finalization court dates to stressful hospital experiences. They are eternally optimistic and Phil is particularly motivational as a former pastor. Listening to him will brighten your day. Check out Phil, Alex, Kinsley, & Callie here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAkM_UgVD8EK4oJePdv36fQ
2. Lifetime Healing Adoption Chat vlog. Lifetime Healing, LLC was founded by Ashley Mitchell, a birth mother. She educates adoption agencies on providing better post-placement care for birth mothers. She also hosts a Q&A adoption chat with others involved in adoption. Here, you can hear stories of adoptive and birth families. Ashley is someone who can help you really understand what birth mothers go through. She is strong, genuine, and empathetic. Scroll through and find these chats here: https://lifetimehealingadoption.com/blog/?category=AC+TV+-+Adoptive+Parents   
3. Natalie Brenner’s blog. Natalie, a resident of Portland, Oregon, is a biological, adoptive, and foster mother. Her book, “This Undeserved Life” and her blog always touch on the hard parts of adoption and foster care, like grief. Although uncomfortable to talk about, it’s important to always remember that adoption stems from someone’s loss. She is a wonderful example of grace and selflessness. Find her and her adorable family here:  https://www.nataliebrennerwrites.com/blog

In addition to these sites, you can also follow Phil & Alex, Ashley Mitchell, and Natalie Brenner on Instagram.

Alex’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alexcongelliere/?hl=en

Ashley’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bigtoughgirl/?hl=en

Natalie’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nataliekbrenner/?hl=en

The post 3 Informative Adoption Blogs appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

So, what do you write about in an adoption blog? Different people write different things. For me, I wrote about not just the logistical steps and paperwork details, and “why” we were waiting for “xyz” thing to happen, but I also wrote about my feelings, my frustration sometimes, my longing to be united with my son, adoption poems, and bits of notes that I had written directly to the son I was yet to be united with.

So, here’s a list of nine things that you can write about on an adoption blog. This will help you get started.

Remember, you don’t have to write a lot. A blog post can be (and should be) relatively short. It’s more likely that people will actually READ it. Or it can be broken up into a series of “parts” if it’s a long story that isn’t feasible to tell in one fell swoop. You’re basically capturing a moment in time, or telling a story, or sharing something that you think others can benefit from.

So, peruse this list, and use it to get some ideas for what you’d want to write about. But, ultimately, the decision is yours. Make your blog what you WANT it to be. Instead of asking yourself, “What should I write about in my adoption blog?” ask yourself, “What do I want to write about in my adoption blog?” And that, ultimately, is your answer.

1. Write about the various steps in the process, as they happen.

This type of blog post is a fact-sharing post and may or may not cover the writer’s feelings or underlying thoughts behind what is going on. Here’s an example, taken from my friend Laura and Dan’s blog, Mainers in Maryland. In this excellent blog, Dan captured, step by step, what he and his wife went through as they navigated the adoption process and waited to be united with their son. In particular, read the blog post from Sunday, March 7, 2010, titled “Two Whirlwind Months.” Here’s an excerpt from it: 

“After receiving our referral, we scheduled a meeting with our social worker to discuss what we had to do for the next phase of the adoption. We met with her on January 15th. The majority of the meeting was used to explain the next round of adoption paperwork that we would need to complete. We also talked about some of the things we would need to do when we bring Zachary home (for example, writing status reports and a visit to our home from our social worker). After the meeting, we knew that our first priority was to get our paperwork completed as quickly as possible so that it wouldn’t slow down the process of bringing Zachary home. While the paperwork wasn’t as extensive as the initial adoption paperwork, there was still much to do. To give you an idea of what we had to do, here’s a list of the primary documents that we had to complete . . .”

2. Write about your feelings and thoughts.

Break it down: How are you feeling TODAY? As in, RIGHT NOW? Write about that. It doesn’t have to be long—a few paragraphs are perfect. Here’s a great example of that, taken from my own blog titled “Kath and Jeff’s Adoption Update” (creative, I know). Most of my posts are about my feelings, but, for a specific example, see the post from Wednesday, November 18, 2009, titled “Being a Mom, and Fixing Little Holes in the Heart.” Here’s an excerpt from it:

“[This week] is proving to be particularly hard for me. Grueling, actually. I’m not sure he’ll be home for Thanksgiving, despite my best efforts to remain positive and prayerful and hopeful. And I worry, now, about what it will be like, for us and for him . . . . and I just want to cry but will choose to smile and look forward to him, instead. Stay positive. Stay positive. Stay positive.”

3.  Write poems or personal essays on your adoption experience.

This is YOUR blog: It’s a perfect place to share the poetry you have written about your wait, the child you are waiting for, and (even after your child is united with you) your experience as a new parent.

4.  Write about, and provide links to, other people’s adoption blogs.

Find the blogs that you have followed up to this point. What adoption blogs may have inspired you to start your own? What did THEY say? What did THEY write about? Tell your readers about these blogs. Share the URLs. What a great way to give fellow parents some exposure and to give other waiting parents some great resources to read and share with family members.

5. Write about interesting adoption-related news items.

What is going on in the adoption community “these days” (meaning, the time of your blog post writing)? These posts can serve as a sort of “time capsule” for your child, later on.

6. Write a letter to the child you’re waiting for.

What are you thinking about? Share that with him or her. As your child grows up, this letter can be a cherished heirloom that can be passed down from generation to generation.

Your adoption blog is a literal chronicle of your journey to parenthood, your thoughts, your feelings. It’s a cyberplace that can help you cultivate your creativity as well as document the logistical steps of your adoption journey. Happy blogging!

The post 5 Things To Write About on An Adoption Blog appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

One, find your village! Seek out those around you who are supportive of your adoption journey. Surround yourself with them whether they be friends, family, coworkers, or neighbors. These will be the people you can turn to when you need to vent about the challenges, rejoice about the progress and any good news, or just have a conversation completely unrelated to adoption to distract yourself.

Two, turn to your faith in whatever way feels most comfortable to you. Some may find that reading scriptures, quiet pondering, and praying provides the ultimate comfort. Others may find that rousing worship hymns or a powerful service, sermon, or testimony is the spark they need to keep going.

Three, listen to uplifting music. Whether it be rock, rap, country, or jazz put on the tunes that bring a smile to your face and jam away.

Four, hold on to hope. This can be one of the hardest things to do, especially during the most challenging and heartbreaking moments, but it is probably the most important. Along with this is also the wisdom to remember that you are not alone on this journey.

Five, find a support group. There are a variety of adoption support groups out there both online and in our local communities that focus on everything from infant adoption, older child adoption, international adoption, and more. Search out the one that suits you and your needs the best. Can’t find one in your area? Create one!

Six, if you need help, ask! There is no shame in asking for help or attending therapy when you need it. 

Seven, invest in your relationships. Make it a point to reach out and connect with loved ones in whatever ways are most fun for you. Girls’ nights out? Spontaneous weeknight dates with your spouse? Focus on filling those relationship bank accounts for the days ahead where you might not have the same amount of time to invest in them once your family grows.

Eight, try out a new hobby. Is there something you’ve always wanted to learn or try your hand at? Now is the time! Sign up for a class or teach yourself.

Nine, prepare yourself and your home in ways that bring you comfort. For some this may mean reading adoption and self-help books, or attending workshops. For others it may mean journaling and meditation. Some may feel that deep cleaning and “nesting” are choices that bring them peace.

Ten, get moving! Exercise is a great way to boost your mood, distract yourself, and work out any frustration, anxiety, or sadness you may be feeling. Blast some tunes or listen to a podcast while you’re exercising to double up on some of these tips, and make the most of your time.

Eleven, don’t stop living your life! It is all too easy to become fully consumed with the process, and to just think about the next steps or all the things your want to do when you bring your child home. Participate in activities that bring you joy; travel, create, stay out late. Make a bucket list of things to do and work though the list crossing items off as you go. Try to focus on positive options that might be difficult to accomplish after you bring home a child, and relish in those moments as you create new memories.

While the adoption process is certainly no picnic, I think it’s worth remembering that this time “in the wait” can be just as special and sacred as the other longed for moments on this journey. It’s all a matter of your mindset and how you choose to fill your days! Hopefully, the eleven suggestions above will be a good starting point to get you on your way!!

The post How to Maintain Sanity in Adoption appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

The arrival or finalization of your child’s adoption is no less joyous an occasion than any birth and you have every right to shout it from the mountain tops! Or not. In the case of transracial adoptions, your adoption story is highly visible, and you’ll have ample opportunity to share. Or not. Additionally, your adoption story may be full of rainbows, sunshine, and lollipop stories that are easy to share. Or not.

We have found it to be true, in our experience, that the more transparent we are about adoption in more formal contexts, the better we are able to advocate for our children regarding their physical and mental health, as well as, their education. 

However, in regard to the general public, it’s all about timing, energy, and motive. There are times I’ve been asked about our adoption journey and I’m more than happy to give an earful of answers, advice, or anecdotes because I have the time and the energy. Some days I have neither of those, but I sense that the person asking is sincere in their motivation, so I’ll make an effort to converse. Then there days, I just want to get checked out of the grocery line, and get my kids home and into bed, so I can plop on the couch and eat the pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream that’s now melting in my cart. Those days, people are just flat out of luck. And that’s okay. I consider it a privilege to share my experiences or take opportunities to advise and educate others about adoption, but I do not consider it an obligation.

When it comes to adoption, like matters of sex, faith, or politics, you should only share when, how much, and with whom you feel comfortable. It is your and your child’s story to tell. Or not.

The post Why It’s Okay to Talk and Not to Talk about Adoption appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

1.)   I Hope You Dance by LeeAnn Womack  

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,

Never settle for the path of least resistance

Livin’ might mean takin’ chances but they’re worth takin’

Whenever I hear the line, “livin’ might mean takin’ chances, but they’re worth takin'” I immediately think of all of the chances we had to take in order to become parents. Never easy, but completely worth it!

2.)   From God’s Arms to My Arms to Yours by Marie Osmond.

Now I know you don’t have to do this, but could you kiss him once for me

The first time that he ties his shoes or falls and skins his knee,

And could you hold him twice as long when he makes his first mistake

And tell him that he’s not alone, sometimes that’s all it takes I know how much he’ll ache.

This song is written from the perspective of a biological mom to an adoptive mom. It brings me to tears every time. It is an excellent reminder that our babies really are twice loved.

3.)   Lullaby In Blue by Bette Midler.

As the years go by, try not to think of us sadly.

Believe it if you can, I wanna see you so badly.

On your birthday, Mama’s thinking of you.

The child I never knew.

This one is written from a biological mom to the child she placed for adoption. It’s just a beautiful reminder that no matter the situation, moms never stop loving their children. 

4.)   Bless the Broken Road by Rascal Flatts.

But I got lost a time or two

Wiped my brow and kept pushing through

I couldn’t see how every sign pointed straight to you

I know this one is supposed to be about romantic love, but there’s only one use of the word “lover” in the whole thing. Every other part makes me think of the long, painful road we walked and how it all lead to our sweet girl!

5.)   With Arms Wide Open by Creed.

With arms wide open

Under the sunlight

Welcome to this place

I’ll show you everything

With arms wide open

Now everything has changed

I’ll show you love

I’ll show you everything

I think this one is intended to be about becoming biological parents, but every bit of it applies to how we feel about our adopted children, too: amazed, nervous, excited, and full of love.

6.)   Officially Alive by Brad Paisley.

It’s not the double kick of an ultrasound

Or a piece of paper on file downtown

It takes more than a beat and a breath and a name

It’s when you’re so in love and so in pain

This is my favorite part of this song, the last line, there. It so beautifully describes adoption.

The post 6 Songs That Have Adoption Themes appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

There are many reasons why a hopeful adoptive parent adoption blog is a good idea for those hopeful to adopt. Whether it’s to find a potential birth parent that is seeking a family for placement, to journal your progress, or to use as a place for adoption professionals to peek into your lives to get to know you–here are five tips for what to share  on a hopeful adoptive parent blog.

1.      Be Authentic. Show the potential birth parents who you really are and why you are hoping to build your family through adoption. Be real. They are making the decision of a lifetime and are searching for real families in everyday life. Let them get to know some of the little things about you such as your favorite food, movie, what you enjoy doing on the weekends, or things you remember fondly about your own childhood that you wish to make into a tradition of your own. This is perfect for agencies and other adoption professionals, such as grants and loan companies, to get attached to you. Keep your profile in their minds–which will ultimately help lead the way to your child.
2.      Pictures, Pictures, Pictures! It is one thing to tell people about yourself, but it is quite another to vividly SHOW them with pictures. Let them into your lives and show them what kind of life your future child will have with you as parents. I’m not talking about professional photos of your family all gathered in a cute staged frame—although those are nice, too. I’m talking about candid shots of you on vacation, playing with children of friends and family, holidays, cuddle time on the sofa, precious moments with your grandparents or parents. Show them who you are, but remember you are not “selling” yourself. While I agree a picture of a sink full of dirty dishes is authentic, it isn’t the message you are wanting to get out there. You are looking for YOUR child and the perfect match. There is a family for every child. And the authentic you, shown in pictures could be just what potential parents placing for adoption are looking for their child. Big colorful pictures with a few sentences to explain them is attractive and informative on a blog. 
3.      Be Vulnerable. This can be a hard one, but a necessary one. In the home study interview you are going to be asked some very personal questions. It’s okay to let people know you are human. It’s okay to open up and let them see the real you. Blogging about your ups and downs during the wait or your disappointment over a failed match are real and allow one to see how you can handle tough situations in life. Writing about your journey as you go through each stage, pile of paperwork, application, and box of tissues shows others your true self and what kind of parent you hope to be.
4.      Make your Blog clear and easy to navigate. While it’s tempting to have thirty different tabs and miles of paragraphs writing every moment of your life. . . . it is important to catch the eye of those stopping by to get to know you and to have an organized clear navigation to your blog. Have your journal of every day events. Have your “About Us” page. Consider throwing those big pictures throughout every page instead of compiling a slide show. You want to show pictures without someone getting lost in hundreds of pictures. Have a link to your profile book and ask your agency or lawyer to keep a link to your blog along with your profile. You can also have a page dedicated to your progress which can be fun for family and friends as well as potential birth parents to see just where you are in your journey.
5.      Be Consistent in your writing! The blog that gets noticed, which also means the hopeful adoptive family that gets noticed, is the one that is consistent in writing and updating the journey. Even if you are in the waiting and everything is done, write about your weekend, a renovation, trip to the store to look at baby items, or just your feelings will keep you out there and get exposure. It also lets everyone know that you are still hopeful and excited to add to your family!

The post What To Share On A Hopeful Adoptive Parent Blog appeared first on Adoption Blog | Open, Reunion, Transracial, Journey & more.

You’ve decided to jump feet first into the realm of the unknown, and you have officially submitted your adoption application papers to your agency of choice. Upon approval, you have a lot of decisions to make. Do we adopt internationally or domestically? Do we differentiate between a boy or a girl, a single or a sibling group? What about special needs? If we choose to go overseas, what country do we choose? How will we afford the first payment? What about all the ones after that?

Even if you don’t decide to formally announce your paper pregnancy, one viable way to encase yourself with a strong village of support, one that will hopefully grow at the same rate as your journey, is to start a blog. Here are six blogging tips to help you run the best adoption blog.

1. Use an interactive hosting site to start the best adoption blog.

There are plenty of free hosting sites available for you to start your blog. Learn the ins and outs of the one you choose, and make it completely user-friendly. Make sure it is easy to navigate, and utilize the tools it gives you, like adding various widgets to your main page. Computer engineers have really sunk some hidden treasures into these free blog sites, so make sure to invest the time in making it what you need. Some good places to start are Blogger and WordPress.

2. Have all your information easy to access.

When you’re designing your blog, make it visually appealing and completely organized. Have your domain name match the title of your blog, and have the big important “need to know” items as widgets on the front page (things such as your fundraising goal, list of recent updates, timeline, country/demographic of your future child, adoption announcement photo, etc.). Having various headings at the top of your web page that can link to more information is a great idea – heading ideas could be “our story,” “fee schedule,” “puzzle fundraiser,” “t-shirt fundraiser,” etc. Each fundraiser would ideally have a separate space on your blog, so that each one could draw in a specific crowd. Make sure to have your updates easy to access, and keep things organized and easily found by date.

3. Update, update, update.

If you want to build a community of support, start writing. Write even when you don’t think you have something to write about – even the mundane is worth knowing. When your village thinks you’re just sitting there, twiddling your thumbs, help them realize that you just filled out your tenth 15-page grant application. When you haven’t updated in awhile because you’re stuck waiting for travel dates, update your support group with a personal submission stating why the wait has been so hard for your family. Don’t be afraid to over-update. Those outside of the adoption world don’t necessarily realize what goes on behind the scenes – addressing the timelines, paperwork, governmental hoops, and never-ending bills help others realize why the plight for adoption truly is a group effort.

4. Ask others to share your story.

Social media can be an adoptive parent’s best friend. Utilize your Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, and/or Twitter to create an even bigger audience. Asking others to share your story truly often only takes a single click. And, with each additional share, you are reaching more and more people that are outside of your inner circle. Pulling people that you don’t personally know onto your blog not only widens your fundraising efforts, but it will help others learn more about the adoption process and culture our world faces today. You’re well on your way to the best adoption blog!

5. Link everything back to your blog.

Whether you are hosting a silent auction fundraiser on Facebook, or sharing a personal story on your Twitter account, an important way to continually filter people back to your blog is to always include your domain name in any of your online posts. Linking back to your blog will encourage continual, reliable traffic. And let’s remember: more online traffic = bigger support community.

6. Be REAL.

Don’t be afraid to share the hard stuff, the personal stuff, or the money stuff. Those things are the real side of adoption, and the world deserves to know how hard adoptive parents are fighting to unite children to their families. The adoption world is already full of bribery, judgement, and sneakiness – we need to continually combat that with honesty and truth. Encourage people to interact with your journey by asking questions and commenting their feelings. Adoption can’t be about only sharing the good. Adoption in and of itself is a difficult process, and we need to make sure that we can be honest about our journey, and share with others what adoption truly looks like.

Having the best adoption blog is a completely doable, and borderline necessary, endeavor. Don’t be afraid to jump right in and ask people to join you. If parenting takes a village, adoption can take a whole country. Build up your support group by being organized, concise, and REAL while sharing your ups, downs, and in betweens on your adoption blog.-

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Everything you need to know about fostering and blogging–all right here.

Social media is everywhere today. But what does it mean for at risk kids in foster care? If you’re a foster parent, you may be very eager to share the latest additions to your household with the world. You may be inspired to share your story, which includes these kids, with the world. Fostering and blogging about it sounds like a good idea.  But should you do it? Here’s what you need to consider before blogging about your family of fosters.

Fostering and Blogging

Always keep in mind that it is HARD to truly erase anything from the internet. Will your foster child want this portion of their life memorialized for all the world to see? What if they are reunified? How will other children in your life feel?

Many children in foster care were removed due to safety issues. Always discuss what is best for the child before blogging or posting any photos of the child on the internet. In many cases, it’s in the best interest of all involved for the location and family caring for the foster child to remain confidential. Safety first.

When it is possible to blog or post about your foster children (it’s highly encouraged to get a social worker’s approval first, before posting ANY photos ANYWHERE online of the child, no matter how private it may seem), foster children CANNOT be identified by name, nor can it be identified that this child is in foster care. Blogging also can’t include any specific information about the child’s case.

Example of WHAT NOT to post

I picked George up today. He’s our new foster kid. He’ll be staying with us for a few months while his parents can work on their drug abuse issues. We ordered his favorite pizza to help ease the transition.

Example of HOW TO blog about your fostering experience

Family night! We got some pizza delivered to the house tonight and are watching our kiddo’s favorite film. He’s a great kid.

Yes, for bloggers that use their blog as a personal journal, this may seem like heavy censorship, but foster parents are there to keep kids safe. A paper journal, privately kept at home, can help take the place of an online journal for parents who want to record their journey as foster parents. This gives bloggers a chance to review their journal and share only appropriate, safe information, while having a safe space to record foster parent challenges. Fostering and blogging can be done, but it must be done with careful consideration.

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